Wednesday, February 4, 2009

He has officially "Crossed Over".

The kid. He ain't no baby no more.

Heya kids. Scrubbie here.

While the pic is 'slightly' out of date in relation to the posting topic today - at least it's a pic of the kid.

For the past number of years - bits have been fallin' off the kid. No, No - not his fingers. He was born like that. No - talking about his pearly whites.

Why bring it up today? Well, yesterday was the final of the baby whites droppin' off the kid. Droppin' out of the kid. Whatever. Actually - it was kinda nice this time 'round. Previous pearlies - the kid has yanked out as a means of makin' some money. Get a job? Babysit? Deliver papers? Shovel the path in front of the igloo for the old man now and then - NAH. Why bother when you've got perfectly good teeth that you can pull out for a couple 'a bucks.

The wife - this was just another dagger in the chest of the kid growin' up. Ladies with bambinos - ya'll know what I'm talkin about.

Speakin' of the wife... Have ya'll noticed how prices have gone up on so many things? Eggs, butter, milk, office equipment. Sky rocketed. Take, for example, the price of thumb tacks. For the past few years, Scrub's been able to step into the local trading post and acquire a box of 100 thumb tacks for under two bucks. Seriously. No, I don't get the real expensive ones. Just the typical brass thumb tacks. Ya'll know the ones I am talkin' about, right? I used to get my monthly box of them under brand names only. Then, I switched over the the generic brands. Just as good, really. And they do the trick. Work just as well.

They don't come in the fancy plastic packaging. I think they call them "blister packs" - ya know - the pretty packages that are clear plastic and you get to see them all in there. Shake the package and they all sparkle under the lights of the trading post. No - the generics that I get every month now are in the little cardboard box. Oh - there'll all in there, but you have to open the box to get a peek of them.

Anyway - I was sayin' about the price of these buggers. So, went into the local trading post just today, as a matter of fact, to get my monthly allotment of sparklies and the price has shot up. WAY UP. Damn'd things cost me almost 3 bucks now. Holy geez. That means that in 2009 - I potentially could be shelling out 36 bucks - just in thumbtacks! How is that fair?

Huh? What? Oh - WHY do I go and get a box of thumbtacks every month? Oh, sorry - I should have explained up front. I did mention "speakin of the wife..."

Well, you see, every month, I am reminded that I have a penis. (giggle - I said "penis" again)

And, that every month, the wife has to endure days of agonizing cramps and discomfort.

And, it is at this time of the month that I am also reminded that she has to endure all of this - FOR WHAT - so that we could have a kid?

And, I am reminded that this will continue for some time.

And, I am reminded that as someone who has a penis (giggle) - I do not know the kind of discomfort that she has to go through.

And, I am reminded that ONLY by swallowing a hundred thumbtacks and letting them work their way through my bowels will I be able to appreciate what she is going through and it is ONLY then that I can comment on it.

Ya, I know... Frack.


Kristine said...


I love Mrs Scrubbie..... :P

Anonymous said...

My Dear Mr Scrubbie You are priceless but the best is yet to come luv you mommalou