Wednesday, October 21, 2009

The day is fast approaching

"Hi Honey... I think my water broke."

Howdy kids. It's Scrubbie at the keys tonight for yer readin' pleasure.

Yes boys & girls - that was the phrase that greeted me at 8:02am 13 years ago today.

See... the Kid - gonna be a teen only two days from now. And, every year, the Wife and me go through the 48 hours that lead up to the arrival.

So - I gets to work. The phone was ringing. Didn't make it to the phone in time. But, said to my pal there "bet that was the Wife sayin the Kid is on the way". Sure enough - 2 mins later - phone rings again. And, yep... the Wife says ... well... you know what she says. No need to get graphic, right?

Scrub hops in the go-kart and fetches the Wife and away we go to the fetus-fetcher.

But - While the bun was in the oven, and pretty near darn ready... things were'nt quite.... ummm.... ready... ummm... yet.

So - sent the Wife and me home to go and have a bit of supper. If the wee fella wasn't slip-slidin' on out overnight - they told us to return to the fetus-fetcher and they'd scare him out - or whatever they were gonna do.

Went home. Went and visited the parents - both sets. Ahhhh... the Wife... she was a'glowin'. Then, we went to a local eatery to scarf down some rotisserie chicken. Couldn't believe the Wife was in labour - and there we were - at a local eatery - scarfin' down some rotisserie chicken. But - there ya go. That's what we did.

Didn't make it through the whole night. The wife - she was feelin' it BIG TIME. So, we packed up again and headed out into the REALLY early morning.

Oh - important to note: Scrub and the Wife had an igloo that was a good .... oh... 50 mins by go-kart at full throttle away from the fetus-fetchin' building. 50 MINUTES! That's an hour if you factor in a stop at Timmies for a coffee. Which, of course, had to happen. We're Canadian, eh.

Now - Scrub was not interested in havin' the Kid make his grand appearance into this world on the side of the road. Nope - not one little bit.

But - as Scrub was a Boy Scout at one time - he remembered the motto "Be Prepared".

So - Scrub had his ERBDK ready to go. Packed. Ready to go.

Huh? OH - ERBDK? Ya - stands for Emergency Roadside Baby Delivery Kit.

Had all the good stuff in it. Couple of towels. Bottled water. Gloves. Turkey baster.

Huh? Turkey baster? Oh hell ya! Ya know - all them doctorin' shows. How they stick a turkey baster up the kids nose after they're born to suck out all the goo? Gotta have a turkey baster in your ERBDK. Obviously.

the story continues....

No comments: